How to Avoid a Custody Battle After Divorce

Avoid a divorce custody battle

Special thanks to Canterbury Law Group Scottsdale for this sponsored post.

Divorce is a messy affair. It’s even messier when you have children. One of the reasons that this occurs is because it’s difficult to think about how to share time with your children. While it seems reasonable to one parent to share care 50/50, new living arrangements, a hectic lifestyle, parent’s work schedules and the needs of children can make spending identical time with each parent pretty impossible. This, however, does not mean that events must dissolve into an ugly custody battle. There are ways that you can work together to makes sure that children get the quality time with each parent.


The first, and perhaps most important part of this process is being able to talk to one another. The passions that erupt during divorce have a tendency to turn any conversation into a shouting match. The well-being of your child or children, however, requires that both of you have a frank conversation. Talk to each other about what a typical day of the week looks like for your children. What needs to stay the same for them and what needs to be different? This will help you sort out more clearly what type of parenting schedule you create. Consider how you will minimize tensions and develop stress-free transitions that allow each of you to spend time with your children.


Hire A Family Lawyer

No, this does not mean that battle lines have been drawn. Rather, attorneys can provide structure to the proceedings. Arrangements between the two parents often need to be finalized and presented to the family court. Lawyers can help with this process. They can also help you think through issues that may come up down the road or raise questions that each parent may not have thought about yet. A good family lawyer can also help keep emotions in check when strong feelings come up. In the early stages of uncoupling, having an agreed arrangement and schedule in the form of legal documentation can be helpful. A skilled family attorney can ensure that the process is handled as quickly and efficiently as possible.


Be Flexible

You may have set certain schedules in place. The real guarantee for a smooth transition, however, is flexibility. As long as it is convenient for your children and you, there’s no legal reason that you can’t deviate from a decree or finalized parenting agreement. If your children want to spend time with their other parent, it’s perfectly okay for you to be flexible. Adjustment is a lot easier on everyone if the interaction between children and parents is as natural after the divorce as it was before. It certainly helps your child to adapt better and ensures that they are less traumatized by everything.


Be Nice

This may not be your first reaction but it’s best for all involved if you do your best to be as pleasant as possible. It will also make your ex-spouse more open to co-parenting and possibly future requests. It’s also important for your children to see both of you being as civil to each other as possible. Divorce is not pleasant but there is no reason for it to be a hateful affair. Being kind to one another will go a long way when both of you attempt to raise your children together.


Divorce is a difficult process for your children. There is no need to make it harder for your kids by fighting over custody. Your children need both parents in their lives so you should do everything in your power to keep the waters as calm as possible. After all, getting through the legal process is only the first step of many when it comes to rebuilding a life after divorce. Do your best to begin on a good note.


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