Posts by Christina McGhee
What is Parent Coordination?
Q – I’m dealing with a very conflictual Ex. The judge has mentioned ordering us to work with a parent coordinator. What is Parent Coordination?A – Parent coordination is a relatively new professional role, which has emerged as an alternative resource for addressing high-conflict family situations. Instead of parents engaging in repeated litigation to resolve…
Read MoreMy child is acting like my co-parent, what do I do?
Q – I see some qualities in my son that remind me of my co-parent Even though I don’t mean to, when he starts acting like my co-parent, I over-react. I’m so worried that my son is going to turn out just like him. I know it is not fair and I should stop comparing…
Read MoreI am divorcing an abusive spouse, what do I say to the children?
Q – I am planning to ask my abusive spouse for a divorce. My children ( 8 and 10 yrs old) have witnessed his outbursts and as a result have experienced nightmares and anxiety. What should I say when I am explaining why I am asking for the divorce? A – Telling children about your decision to divorce…
Read MoreCo-Parent is sharing financial information with the kids
Q – My co-parent is sending messages through my kids about child support and putting them in the middle of adult financial issues. What should I do? A – When an co-parent puts kids in the middle of adult issues it can be beyond frustrating. Unfortunately when this happens, parents tend to either respond by trying to…
Read MoreMiddle Ground – Handling Discipline Differences Between Two Households
When discipline differences between divorced parents rear their ugly head, even the most amicable co-parents can begin to feel edgy and frustrated. Navigating issues such as what’s an appropriate bedtime for 5-year-old Rebecca, to at what age should Charlie get a cell phone can easily put parents at odds with one another. As a divorce…
Read MorePARENTING APART TIP: Avoid using court-based language with kids
Words can be very powerful. Do your kids a favor and avoid using legal terms like “visit” and “visitation.” Instead talk about time with Mom & time with Dad or Mom’s house/Dad’s house. Regardless of how time is spent between households, allow children the opportunity to have two homes. Remember even through your relationship has…
Read MorePARENTING APART TIP: Blended family life-help kids feel connected and respected
When merging families focus on helping each member of your newly formed family feel connected and respected. Create a sense of belonging by having special space for each child. Even if you can’t give each child their own room, do what you can to provide a dedicated place for personal items so when kids are…
Read MorePARENTING APART TIP – Discipline differences
“Live so that when your children think of fairness and integrity, they think of you.” H. Jackson Brown, Jr. When differences come up don’t undermine the other parent’s authority by making critical comments or offering judgement. Instead agree to disagree. Send a message to kids that respecting parents is important. Even though you may not…
Read MorePARENTING APART TIP – Kids and feelings
Most of us have emotions that we connect with more easily than others. Your children are no different. Often kids have a “default emotional response” especially when life is stressful or big changes are happening the family. This means that instead of showing us how scared or anxious they are, it may be easier for…
Read MorePARENTING APART TIP – What will make them proud?
Years from now when your kids look back on this experience. What will make them proud about how you handled things? Remember raising kids is a marathon not a sprint. When I listen to children talk about their childhood, its not one event or thing that their parents did that stands out for them. Rather,…
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